ansketil: (amadeus - the emperor & mozart)
[personal profile] ansketil
Title: Dark Liaisons III
Disclaimer: I do not own Les Liaisons Dangereuses or Star Wars.
Characters: Count Dooku, Palpatine, Padmé Amidala, Anakin Skywalker, and Obi-Wan Kenobi.
Rating: PG-13
Summary: Master Kenobi and Chancellor Palpatine reprimand their students and Padmé asks for help.
Author's Note: I was rereading Les Liaisons Dangereuses and Labyrinth of Evil and the two sort of... collided. In case people haven't realised, this is definitely an AU story. Things unfold slightly differently than in Attack of the Clones. I'm currently working on Alexis and You Know Who, but I desperately need to take myself somewhere else, so here is the next instalment of Star Wars letters.
Previous Chapter(s):
Dark Liaisons IDark Liaisons II



Senator Amidala to Chancellor Palpatine –

I received your kind note. Really, there is no need for you to apologise for what happened the other night; it was in no way your fault. You have always been the best of hosts and a very good friend to me. I remember when it was you who served as Senator of Naboo and not I... oh, how I wish we could return to those days! You were never without helpful advice and it is to this end that I write to you now. I am in need of wise counsel and know not who else to turn to.

When you handed Anakin’s letter to me just before last week’s session discussing Senator Ask Aak’s proposal for an increased centralisation of Republic authority in the Mid Rim, I thought it was something to do with the upcoming vote and read it immediately and completely forgot my speech against the idea of further centralisation! Of course, I do not blame you, as you obviously had no idea what kind of missive Anakin had entrusted you with, whatever he might claim. I know you better than that. Still, he advises me to take you into my confidence and I think that is the only half-way sane thing he says in his entire letter. 

I cannot lie to you; I cannot say that it did not give me a great deal of pleasure when I read his letter, shocking though it was. In it, he declared his love for me – would you believe it? In truth, I would rather be miserable for the rest of my life than that he had not written what was in his heart. Yet I know perfectly well that I must give him to understand that I am offended by it. I cannot reply to him, nor give him even the faintest hint of encouragement after his display at the opera. If Padawan Skywalker is not mindful of his station, then I must have a care of his behalf – out of respect for the heroism he showed defending our home. He will become a great Jedi, as you and I both know, and a Jedi cannot be the husband I have always wanted. 

Would you speak to him for me and explain to him as kindly as you can that his pursuit is hopeless? I realise you have many more important concerns, but I can think of no one else so tactful, who is both my friend and his, and I hesitate to send any reply, as I fear the attention would only encourage him. 
 
Respectfully yours, etc.

Obi-Wan Kenobi to Anakin Skywalker –

Master Yoda has written to me about your behaviour while in the company of the Supreme Chancellor and Senator Amidala - which was obvious, apparently, to just about everyone in the theatre. I am very disappointed in you, apprentice. Have I not always taught you that a Jedi must always comport himself with dignity? I understand you have long had a great affection for Senator Amidala, but a Jedi must always be mindful of his thoughts and feelings.

In these past few weeks I have come to harbour a great affection for Yan Dooku, yet never have I approached our growing friendship with anything other than the dignity befitting a Jedi. I wish that the Council had allowed me to take you with me to Serenno, as you would greatly benefit by observing the Count’s own impeccable manners. Just the other day he remarked that the more he sees of the galaxy, the stricter his morals become, and I can well imagine he would be in complete agreement with me on the question of your recent behaviour. 

As to my mission, Dooku’s difficulties with the Jedi Order are not yet resolved. Mostly, they are political in nature, and you know that is not my area of expertise, but I have pressed my case with what tools of persuasion I have. Dooku gives great credence to a certain group of prophecies which foresee the end of the Republic and he has grown disillusioned that the Jedi can do anything to halt the government’s decline. You will be pleased to know that he has great respect for your friend Palpatine (apparently they became acquainted when Dooku served as Palpatine’s Jedi escort on a diplomatic mission), but feels that the Chancellor does not have enough power to truly effect positive change. Yet, despite such pessimism, I still hope for some success. He informed me that I had worked much good upon him in our talks, and that I gave him back what he had thought lost with Master Jinn’s death. He told me that he would like it very much if we could become close, and I am sure it is what Qui-Gon would have wanted. We have taken to meditating together every morning and sparring afterward, as the Count has missed the noble art of Jedi combat. The Count’s mastery of almost every position is astonishing. Many younglings would have given their right arms to be his student, and I am beginning to see where Qui-Gon gained the mastery of the blade for which he was renowned. 

I hope to see you again soon and may the Force be with you.

Chancellor Palpatine to Count Dooku –

Your preoccupation with Jedi Kenobi has blunted your mind, just as I feared it might. I confided to you my various philanthropies of the past two weeks and you sent me back a letter filled with nothing but advice, as if you have any authority to lecture me! Your suggestions for persuading the senator to admit the dear padawan to her heart and a rendezvous between the unhappy pair were laughable, almost as laughable as your account of your efforts with Anakin’s master. What is necessary now between the two ignorant young persons is not help, but hindrance. The less sure Skywalker is of being loved, the more enterprising he will be in his disconsolation – it is mystery which leads to daring, after all. One cannot be a hero if all is convenient. To this end, I encouraged both Amidala’s silence and Anakin’s ardour. Besides, the good senator has always been the sort of being who draws strength from stating her opinions. The sheer weight of unanswered lovelorn correspondence will wear the girl down. 

Now, as to the matter of you and Kenobi, I am fast becoming sure that you quite deserve each other. So, you boast of having made a hypocrite of your Jedi. I have no use for you any longer – you boast of performing a commonplace while completely failing in what you set out to do. It is very easy to make a man do what he wants - the trick is persuading him to do what you want and in this I judge Kenobi far more successful than you. You were right to fear you would squander the lessons I took the trouble to impart to you. Even my nostalgia for the pleasant time we spent together cannot alter my opinion of one who has so clearly fallen for the negligible charms of Obi-Wan Kenobi. Your lack of correspondence says as much – I only heard news of you by a letter Anakin showed me from his master. You disappoint me, sir, you disappoint me greatly. You are in love with that Jedi and you are making yourself ridiculous – worse, just as dull as the object of your affections. Consider my previous entreaties finished with and banish them from your mind.
 
 

Date: 2011-08-10 02:42 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] wyncatastrophe.livejournal.com
Bahahahaha. Oh, dear. I like this far too much.

Date: 2011-08-10 03:28 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] ansketil-rose.livejournal.com
It's very fun to write! XD

Date: 2011-08-10 03:58 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] veronicaprof.livejournal.com
And everyone is so wonderfully erudite. :)

Date: 2011-08-10 05:55 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] ansketil-rose.livejournal.com
Yes, that's the best part of crossing Star Wars with Les Liaisons Dangereuses! The language. :)

Date: 2011-10-28 01:30 am (UTC)
ext_11399: (Default)
From: [identity profile] kittenmommy.livejournal.com

The Count’s mastery of almost every position is astonishing.

Oh. Oh dear! LOL

Date: 2011-10-29 02:39 pm (UTC)
ext_471285: (Default)
From: [identity profile] flywoman.livejournal.com
I loved that line, too!

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